Rachel Salzberg
Everyone I have been talking to lately between clients, friends, leaders, have all said they are experiencing a lack of motivation, exhaustion, burnout, and grief, including myself. Being positive can be very difficult, and it is important to acknowledge that everyone is suffering in different ways. There are numerous articles and studies that validate this as well, and we have to support ourselves, and each other, more than ever.
As a mindset and leadership coach, I attempt to be strong, and positive all the time (an unrealistic goal, limiting belief I have realized).
This expectation that I had created for myself left me feeling more exhausted physically, and mentally. The impact that this indescribable time in history has had, has worn us down, and I, and countless others, have little motivation lately. Even leveraging all my own tools around shifting to a positive mindset, and daily meditation, is hard to do sometimes, if I arbitrarily put too much on may plate. But if I reframe my “TO DO” list, to be based on “less, versus more”, and make my priorities ones that support mental health and well being, and my purpose, then and I allow space to ReSet. I think of this as ReSouling myself daily, and incrementally, throughout. Then I am able to ReSurge with motivation, positivity, inspiration and clarity, so I can be a support for others.
We can remember that no one is an exception to feel burnout and overwhelm if we put too much on our plates, and we are not giving ourselves grace, and permission to be less hard on ourselves. By clearing or plate, we take the pressure off of ourselves, and also lets others off the hook of feeling the need to also perform to an unrealistic expectation.” With this awareness, we are reminded to have more empathy, and empower others to also, ReSet.
Conscious, or unconscious negative self-talk is self-destructive. Do these statements sound familiar? “I have to be strong”, “I should” “I need do it all to be successful, or I will get behind”. “Self care does not apply to me.” “I am not enough, therefore I have to keep doing.” “I will take care of myself later.” When you notice this chatter, STOP, pause and interrupt this unproductive self talk, and recognize that it is fabricated, and self-created. By doing so, you make healthy decisions on what actions you are take, it resolves the guilt of not following through on a fabricated to do list, and the feelings of not “accomplishing.” Over-committing, or placing unrealistic expectations on self, or others is debilitating and paralyzing. Clearing our plate is a demonstration of self-love, and has an amazing impact on your wellbeing, and how you treat others. With this awareness, we can communicate what we need to our families, friends, coworkers, and leaders. We give ourselves permission to set boundaries and allow ourselves time to rest, listen to our bodies, not push ourselves when we do not feel inspired. We create more space by removing these sorts of statements from our vocabulary and create reasonable goals, and expectations for ourselves, and those around us. This helps to eliminate burnout, overwhelm, erosion of self-confidence, and a breeding ground for anxiety and depression. Be honest to those you talk to, whether friends or clients, and let them know you have been guilty of negative self-talk. It helps people to realize that we are all going through something similar, and have had our own versions of this, especially during this global crisis. The vulnerability that comes with this, allows us to share our stories, to realize we are not alone, and we can offer tools to support and motivate each other. This is the courage and strength that we can all provide.
These are simple mindset steps and actions that do not require more time and help you to“ReSoul and ReSurge. Even if you do a few, you have taken positive action in your life without adding more “to do’s’:
1. Give yourself grace, and ask for what you need.
2. Clear your plate of obligations and enjoy the simplicities of life that this experience has made us appreciate even more.
3. Consistently, TAKE TIME OFF, (meaning unplug from work) even if it is a few hours, a day, or weeks, and schedule consistent times of solitude.
4. Go within, create your own inner peace, visualize.
5. Schedule time to move your body, learn something new, be playful, get out into nature.
6. Take the pressure off of large goals and create small goals each day that keep you moving forward.
7. Work, and “do” less, and get lost in something creative.
8. Stop the unproductive self-talk that fosters guilt of “should’s”.
9. Know and schedule your “big rocks” as it relates to your values and make those priorities, versus filling your days with reactivity, as a result of a false sense of urgency
10. Talk to people, ask for support, do not isolate.
11. Set boundaries around social media, the news, or even talking about it.
12. Find gratitude in the moment, notice a flower, because the NOW is the only thing we know, and we can chose to cherish it.
13. Get clear on your purpose and values, do something each day that aligns with it, it can be small and simple, but it makes a huge impact.
14. Practice mindfulness, and allow yourself time to rebuild doing things such as journaling, meditation, visualization, for a few minutes multiple times a day.
Shifting the lens through which we see our priorities is a discipline to be used consistently in order to keep healthy, motivated, creative, and inspired, even in the midst of uncertainty.
With simple practices, even if you do only a few, actually make our to do list smaller. We create new, productive, beliefs that gives us permission to take care of ourselves, which makes a huge difference in how we feel, and we are better for ourselves, our families, our colleagues, and those we lead. Once we have cleared our plate, a fresh perspective is gained so that you can, again move forward with positivity, hope, and motivation, despite what is happening in our world. Therein lies the strength. We do not have to do it alone and the more we communicate, ask for support, we can build a community of accountability partners to help ensure that we are making more space to ReSoul and ReSurge. This is a movement we can create together. The ReSoul Revolution. I would love to help.
